To some degree, I believe it's human nature to avoid acknowledging our truths when it could mean certain rejection by loved ones, or that big changes will ensue, or we will have to take more responsibility for some things than we'd really like to. It makes sense; we are wired to avoid things we have labeled as painful, difficult, or unacceptable by loved ones.
Through working with clients, I’ve noticed that when people start to cancel a lot of appointments because life is just “getting in the way,” there’s usually a deeper reason, something connected to underlying truths.
Sometimes it’s a lack of commitment to making the time and space for self-development or relationship healing, (because painful and challenging and hard work are not at the top of our "fun" list!), or a lack of bandwidth for any of the above. (no judgment-we heal when we're ready to!)
And other times it’s because there’s a truth inside of them that they aren’t ready to face yet. It can be a positive and empowering truth, and yet it can still be scary and overwhelming and potentially life-altering in a way that the ego mind cannot predict or protect us from.
This deep truth is bound to be revealed in therapy, and they are petrified that revealing it, acknowledging it, and voicing it out loud could mean hurting someone they love, or that their life will change so drastically from the truth reveal that they won’t be able to handle it.
But here's the cool part that most of us don't realize: more often than not, the honoring of one’s truth creates a wave of relief from having to pretend who they are. Yes, it can also create a wave of challenges, but the ability to be in integrity with oneself makes challenges so much easier to deal with. In fact, being in touch with your truth brings clarity for how to be with the challenges that arise, because the only option is to make decisions that stay in integrity with that truth.
No more needing to figure out how to manipulate your truth so that others find it more palatable, or so that others don't leave you. That in itself requires a ton of energy and creative thinking that can now be freed up to live the life as you truly desire.
If you're reading this and wondering how could you possibly face/acknowledge/own XYZ truth that you've been hiding (consciously or subconsciously), I invite you to ponder this:
When we are not forthright with who we are and what we want out of life and relationships, how can life meet us? How can others meet us where we’re at if we’re hiding our truths?
I get it, and I've been there: It can take great courage to get in touch with and voice our truths. Yet the reward is clarity for you as well as for others. The reward is authentic living. The reward is building self-trust and inner congruence. The reward is being seen for the brilliant being you truly are, whatever that looks like.
So, my friends, I encourage you to let the truth of your soul guide you forward to the next step on your life path. If you were 100% honoring your truths, what comes next?
I promise: even if some current relationships fall out of your life from your truth reveals, you will not be alone forever. Keeping people in your life under false pretenses does not serve you and does not serve them. Keeping people in your life because you’re “afraid to hurt their feelings” does more damage in the long run than being up front and honest.
Your truth is your truth. Nobody can argue or begrudge you your truths.
You are worthy of having life on your terms. Please, practice speaking your truths, even if they’re dissonant, unpopular, and non-traditional.
And if you need some support in uncovering your truths, finding the courage to speak your truths, or navigating the changes that arise from being your authentic self, I'd be honored to steward you through that process via one of the many services I offer, such as Psychotherapy, Coaching, and Intuitive Healing Arts.